Showing posts with label self growth in your 20s. Show all posts
Showing posts with label self growth in your 20s. Show all posts
Lessons Every Girl in Her Early 20s Needs to Know - From a Late 20s Girl Turning 28
Tuesday, December 23, 2025
If I could sit down with my younger self, or with any girl in her early 20s feeling overwhelmed by life, these are the lessons I’d share.
1. Your 20s Are for Exploration, Not Perfection
College and the years after were a huge wake-up call for me. I tried different paths, experienced both entrepreneurship and corporate life, and realized that no decision is ever truly wasted. Every experience teaches you something about what you want, and what you don’t. You don’t need to have it all figured out. You just need to keep showing up and learning.
2. Friendships Will Change — and That’s Okay
Some friendships are meant to last a lifetime, and others are meant to last for a season. Letting go doesn’t mean failure; it means acceptance. There’s no need to hold onto something that served its purpose at the time it did. Growth often requires space.
3. Stop Expecting People to Love You the Way You Love Them
One of the hardest lessons I learned was that not everyone will show up the way you do. I used to be the one always checking in, asking deep questions, and keeping relationships alive, only to feel disappointed when the effort wasn’t returned.
You shouldn’t expect anything in return, but you also shouldn’t be the only one trying. If communication doesn’t lead to change, that’s an answer in itself. Having a high tolerance doesn’t mean allowing people to cross your boundaries or make you feel like you’re overreacting. Especially in new friendships, you’re allowed to speak up.
4. Relationships Are Not a Race
Just because you want to be in a relationship doesn’t mean it’s the right time, or the right person. Sometimes it’s more important to know what you don’t want than what you do. Don’t rush things because your peers already experienced them. Listen to your gut. Attraction doesn’t always mean compatibility, and it’s okay to change your mind once you get to know someone better. Never settle just because someone shows interest.
5. Trust Your Own Judgment
I wish I had stopped accepting pressure to try things or give people more chances when deep down I already knew it wouldn’t work. Self-reflection and honesty with yourself will save you so much energy. Your intuition exists for a reason, learn to trust it.
6. Success Is Not Linear
The world changes fast. One year might be financially amazing, and the next might feel unstable. That doesn’t mean you’re failing. As long as you show up and try your best, there is always a way forward. Success isn’t one big milestone, it’s made of small wins we often overlook.
7. Be Intentional With Your Money
I was always good at budgeting, but now I understand something deeper: money should support the life you want. I’d rather spend it on experiences, books, and growth than on things meant to impress others. Choose intentionally.
8. Failure Is Often Redirection
Just because you think you deserve something doesn’t mean it was meant for you. Sometimes a door closes so a better one can open. Failure isn’t the end, it’s guidance.
9. Saying No Is a Form of Self-Respect
Saying no to others is saying yes to yourself. Burnout comes and goes, but consistency is a choice. Protect your energy.
10. Your Body Is Not the Problem
Body image is something most women struggle with. It’s a work in progress, and that’s okay. Focus on small, sustainable steps that improve your overall health, physically and mentally.
11. You Don’t Need Everyone’s Approval
I stopped caring so much about other people’s opinions in my mid-20s. No one knows you better than you know yourself. Most opinions are surface-level and often reflect someone else’s emotional state. You don’t need to be liked by everyone.
12. Confidence Comes From Knowing Who You Are
Real confidence means knowing yourself and not letting others define you. It’s quiet, grounded, and deeply personal.
13. Honor the Life You Want
Women fought for the freedom to choose, and that means all choices. Wanting a family and a simple life is just as valid as wanting a career-driven one. No one gets to shame you for what fulfillment looks like to you.
14. Know Your Values and Protect Them
Your 20s can be chaotic and overwhelming. You’ll be influenced by school, family, friends, work, and society. Take time to understand your core values and stick to them. Reflect, stay curious, think critically, and don’t accept things that feel wrong just to fit in. Your conscience will guide you, if you listen.
A Birthday Reminder
If you’re in your early 20s reading this: you’re not behind. You’re not weird for choosing differently. And you’re not lost, you’re becoming.
And to my younger self: I forgive you for overthinking. And I thank you for being brave enough to start.
Happy 28 to me, and to growth, clarity, and choosing ourselves 🤍
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If I could sit down with my younger self, or with any girl in her early 20s feeling overwhelmed by life, these are the lessons I’d share.
1. Your 20s Are for Exploration, Not Perfection
College and the years after were a huge wake-up call for me. I tried different paths, experienced both entrepreneurship and corporate life, and realized that no decision is ever truly wasted. Every experience teaches you something about what you want, and what you don’t. You don’t need to have it all figured out. You just need to keep showing up and learning.
2. Friendships Will Change — and That’s Okay
Some friendships are meant to last a lifetime, and others are meant to last for a season. Letting go doesn’t mean failure; it means acceptance. There’s no need to hold onto something that served its purpose at the time it did. Growth often requires space.
3. Stop Expecting People to Love You the Way You Love Them
One of the hardest lessons I learned was that not everyone will show up the way you do. I used to be the one always checking in, asking deep questions, and keeping relationships alive, only to feel disappointed when the effort wasn’t returned.
You shouldn’t expect anything in return, but you also shouldn’t be the only one trying. If communication doesn’t lead to change, that’s an answer in itself. Having a high tolerance doesn’t mean allowing people to cross your boundaries or make you feel like you’re overreacting. Especially in new friendships, you’re allowed to speak up.
4. Relationships Are Not a Race
Just because you want to be in a relationship doesn’t mean it’s the right time, or the right person. Sometimes it’s more important to know what you don’t want than what you do. Don’t rush things because your peers already experienced them. Listen to your gut. Attraction doesn’t always mean compatibility, and it’s okay to change your mind once you get to know someone better. Never settle just because someone shows interest.
5. Trust Your Own Judgment
I wish I had stopped accepting pressure to try things or give people more chances when deep down I already knew it wouldn’t work. Self-reflection and honesty with yourself will save you so much energy. Your intuition exists for a reason, learn to trust it.
6. Success Is Not Linear
The world changes fast. One year might be financially amazing, and the next might feel unstable. That doesn’t mean you’re failing. As long as you show up and try your best, there is always a way forward. Success isn’t one big milestone, it’s made of small wins we often overlook.
7. Be Intentional With Your Money
I was always good at budgeting, but now I understand something deeper: money should support the life you want. I’d rather spend it on experiences, books, and growth than on things meant to impress others. Choose intentionally.
8. Failure Is Often Redirection
Just because you think you deserve something doesn’t mean it was meant for you. Sometimes a door closes so a better one can open. Failure isn’t the end, it’s guidance.
9. Saying No Is a Form of Self-Respect
Saying no to others is saying yes to yourself. Burnout comes and goes, but consistency is a choice. Protect your energy.
10. Your Body Is Not the Problem
Body image is something most women struggle with. It’s a work in progress, and that’s okay. Focus on small, sustainable steps that improve your overall health, physically and mentally.
11. You Don’t Need Everyone’s Approval
I stopped caring so much about other people’s opinions in my mid-20s. No one knows you better than you know yourself. Most opinions are surface-level and often reflect someone else’s emotional state. You don’t need to be liked by everyone.
12. Confidence Comes From Knowing Who You Are
Real confidence means knowing yourself and not letting others define you. It’s quiet, grounded, and deeply personal.
13. Honor the Life You Want
Women fought for the freedom to choose, and that means all choices. Wanting a family and a simple life is just as valid as wanting a career-driven one. No one gets to shame you for what fulfillment looks like to you.
14. Know Your Values and Protect Them
Your 20s can be chaotic and overwhelming. You’ll be influenced by school, family, friends, work, and society. Take time to understand your core values and stick to them. Reflect, stay curious, think critically, and don’t accept things that feel wrong just to fit in. Your conscience will guide you, if you listen.
A Birthday Reminder
If you’re in your early 20s reading this: you’re not behind. You’re not weird for choosing differently. And you’re not lost, you’re becoming.
And to my younger self: I forgive you for overthinking. And I thank you for being brave enough to start.
Happy 28 to me, and to growth, clarity, and choosing ourselves 🤍
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